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SLOPGATE

Published In The Public Interest · Whether The Public Is Interested Or Not

“The spacing between the G and A, and the descent of the A, have been noted. They will not be corrected. — Ed.”

Vol. I · No. I · Late City EditionFriday, March 27, 2026Price: The Reader's Attention · Nothing More

Commercial Correspondence

Advertising Policy

The paper accepts limited advertising. The word “limited” is not a courtesy. It is a description of the inventory, which consists of one notice per edition, placed at the bottom of the front page under the heading “A Notice of Commercial Interest.” There is one such position. It is available or it is not. Scarcity is not manufactured. It is arithmetic.

The notice is written by the paper's staff in the paper's voice. The sponsor provides facts — the name of the enterprise, the nature of its business, and such claims as it wishes to make on its own behalf. The paper applies its editorial voice to these facts and reserves the right to note any irony it considers relevant. This is not negotiable. Sponsors who require control of their own copy are advised to seek publications that permit it. There are many. This is not one.

The notice appears on the front page of the edition in which it is placed. It appears in the weekly edition email. It is archived permanently with the edition. The sponsor of Vol. I, No. 1 is the sponsor of Vol. I, No. 1 forever. This is in the rate card. It is also in the nature of a historical record, which does not revise itself at the expiration of a media buy.

The paper does not track its readers. It does not install cookies, pixels, beacons, or any other apparatus of surveillance. It does not report click-through rates, because it does not track clicks. It does not report impressions, because it does not count them. Reach is the readership. The readership is the people who read the paper. The paper does not know how many there are. It knows they are reading, because they are here, and that is sufficient.

Sponsors are accepted at the paper's sole discretion. The paper will not accept advertising from enterprises whose primary business is the production of the material the paper was founded to document. This is not a moral position. It is a conflict of interest, and the paper recognizes conflicts of interest even when the conflicting parties do not.

Inquiries regarding sponsorship may be directed to the Commercial Correspondent at advertising@slopgate.io. The Commercial Correspondent will respond at a pace consistent with the paper's editorial standards, which is to say when the response is ready and not before.

This policy was drafted by the Editor-in-Chief and adopted by the Commercial Correspondent, who is the same person. The conflict inherent in this arrangement has been noted. It will not be corrected. — W.C.E.